Updated: 28/03/18 : 05:31:59
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Simon ends day minus mantle of Mighty Mouse

By Eugene McGloin
Political Editor


CALLING POPEYE: Send some of your magic spinach to Simon as fast as you can.

Fast as in double pronto: March 27th 2018 was to be the day of days in the career of the young Corkman.

Take Tea

First up he was to ‘take tea,’ so to speak, with the Russian Ambassador.

Not quite scalding samovars at dawn but a clear message all the same.

Simon saw earlier in the day that his native newspaper, The Irish Examiner, had him front page.

He had a new formula to assuage the fears of all and sundry on his Cabinet colleague’s drive to abortion, a type of Catch 22 catch-all.

Catch 22? By the time yesterday was over it was (too) obvious Simon wouldn’t even catch a common cold.

Many Moons

Instead, his formula was snookered by Leo with all the soothing smugness he could muster.

Simon had been stripped of his mantle as even Mighty Mouse by his opponent, none other than Leo the Lion.

Many moons ago, it was the late Jim Kemmy from Limerick who identified the phenomenon.

Hoarse Whimper

Mighty Mouse roars into action back in the constituency but by the time he/she hits Dublin and the Dail he/she morphs into nothing more than a hoarse whimper, a church mouse.

Not even Popeye’s potent spinach could ever save such a wimpish species.

Simon ran out of ideas yesterday and Leo also snookered another tight game with his abolition of the €5 million ‘spin unit.’ 

Thus March 28th 2018 could yet become the Corkman’s epitaph.

His colleagues will simply remember it, if it comes to pass, as The Day The Muse (Sic) Died.

Link: Sligo Today 27/3/2018.